Review of “Filling Empty” by Randy C. Watts

Filling Empty, as the title promotes, is a collection of ideas to help those that have lost loved ones and are trying to navigate the rocky waters of grieving. Watts, a former member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, poignantly and painfully discusses his experience in trying to resolve the overwhelming feelings of pain and loss of his “soul mate” to cancer. He offers hope and help throughout the work, focusing on specific steps grieving people can take to help themselves in what is often a long and painful process. 

One of the most valued strengths of this work is his warnings to family, friends and loved ones of what not to do when they interact with someone who is dealing with a major loss to death. He pleads with those that encounter these situations to avoid uttering platitudes, or even those things that might have been helpful to them in similar situations, and rather listen with empathy and express a desire to understand and be there for them for the long haul as grief often lasts longer than one would expect.

Randy’s suggestions to those suffering grief are universal. Many are similar to things I have encouraged clients to do who have sought my assistance as a therapist. He encourages those struggling with great loss to be patient and compassionate with themselves seeking always to take small steps in the healing process and always exercise self-compassion.  

This book will help many that face the long and painful process of grief and loss, and I would recommend it to any that might find themselves navigating the often-gut wrenching prospect of healing after loss.