Maidenhood, Spinsterhood & Sex
The highlight of attending Young Woman’s each Sunday was seeing C.J.
C.J. was one of the Young Women’s advisers and she wasn’t your typical LDS woman. She was blunt, honest and downright irreverent at times. I looked to her as more of a big sister, rather than a teacher. She was in her late 20’s, unmarried and, by Mormon standards, a spinster. She chose to attend the family ward with her elderly parents, rather than the singles ward because it was “a meat market”. She was graceful, quick-witted and charming. At nearly 6 feet tall, she was not only beautiful, but very intimidating. She was like a blond version of “Xena Warrior Princess“.
One Sunday, us girls were sitting around chatting about the latest movie that had been released… Ghost. Many of us had been banned by our parents from seeing this movie because of “the scene“… you know the one I’m talking about. C.J. informed us that she had already seen the movie and she provided us with some tantalizing tidbits about the controversial love scene.
I was friends with C.J.’s niece, Sandra. Later that week, Sandra and I begged C.J. to take us to watch Ghost. She agreed to take us if we would promise to cover our eyes when she told us to… meaning we would miss any sexual scenes, thus protecting our innocence. We agreed.
We jumped into her convertible and drove to the theatre. We were positively giddy with excitement over seeing a movie that was rated PG-13. We felt very grown up.
C.J. sat between us in the theatre, so she could properly chaperon us during the 3 minutes of pornography we were about to witness. By the time the movie started we were getting excited, anxiously waiting for the love making to begin.
Finally the moment arrived… The jukebox clicked and Unchained Melody quietly played in the background. Sam (Patrick Swayze) took Molly (not Mormon; Demi Moore!) into his arms. C.J. hissed loudly, “Shield your eyes, girls!!” We quickly covered our eyes. There was a low chuckle from the man sitting behind me and I instinctively turned to glare at him. That’s when C.J.’s hand flew over my eyes and she hissed again, “Shield those eyes, missy!” How humiliating! But I did as I was told. During those precious minutes, I strained to hear any moaning or panting between Sam and Molly while visualizing their nude bodies in utter ecstasy. I must have done a bang up job because I could have used a cigarette afterward. Whew! That was more than this little Mia Maid could handle!
Fast forward a few years. My mother came home from the video store with a few movies and tossed them on the counter. I paid little attention until I saw the famous cover from the movie, Ghost. The shiny plastic case called to me and I knew I had to partake of sin, once again. That evening, while my parents were out, I took the opportunity to fast forward the video and finally watch the infamous sex scene with my eyes wide open…
Dammit. It was better in my imagination.
Cross-posted from my blog, The Sacred Sister