Weirdest Mormon Story Maybe Ever

Utah Weird. Plain Old Weird

Links to a very strange Mormon-related story have begun appearing in my Facebook feed, and I must share here. The SL Trib Headline reads “LDS branch leader booted after sexual assault charge.” Turns out that Efrey Guzman, a 46-year-old president of a Latino branch in Sandy, “allegedly groped girl, attacked her mom, bit her brothers penis.” As one of my FB friends put it, here’s a sentence I really did not expect to read today:

As the son was trying to pull Guzman off his mother, Guzman attacked the son, grabbed his penis from his boxer shorts and “bit his penis, causing severe damage that required surgery,” according to charging documents.

7 thoughts on “Weirdest Mormon Story Maybe Ever

  1. That was a really weird and awful story. I’m curious as to whether he has a criminal past or if people have complained about him previously, and if so, why the Mormon Church didn’t pick up on that. Behavior like this rarely comes out of nowhere, there are usually some warning signs leading up to such an extreme act.

  2. When I read that, what I imagine is that the scuffle had reached the ground and the man was being restrained, whereupon he decided that biting the other guy’s penis was one of the few options he had — especially since the son was in boxers and the target was “available,” so to speak. Unless the guy specifically went for it for symbolic reasons — “I’m going to bite your manhood because I want your sister and you’re in my way!!!” — which would be a rather disturbing thought-process (not that everything leading to the biting is not also disturbing). The actual targeting of the penis on its own I don’t find particularly odd, though.

    In fighting for sport (mixed martial arts, taequando, etc), the groin is an unacceptable target, but IRL fights, it’s actually quite vulnerable — mostly because folks don’t expect it to be attacked.

  3. I find the whole thing odd, including the guy going to the girl’s house twice and demanding to see her, then attacking her mother when she refuses to let him into the house. It’s all disturbing, start to finish.

  4. Another data point in the case for the LDS church having a more professional clergy who have been trained and screened. I wonder if someone in the COB has done the calculation that it would cost less to settle liability cases than to pay for a more qualified clergy.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *